Computer games giant Ubisoft caused a storm yesterday when they announced details of the new “Ubiscrewed” DRM to be used on forthcoming PC games.

It follows the failure of their previous drm that was touted as uncrackable, and an end to piracy. All the old DRM did was cause a delay from release to cracking, it wasn’t long before scene groups like Skidrow were releasing perfectly working copies.

The new protection scheme – Ubiscrewed as it has been tagged – imposes heavier restrictions on the legitimate user, and has been touted as, if not totally uncrackable, totally unworth the effort needed to crack. We’ve already thought that about a few of Ubis recent games like the meh Assassins Creed 2 though.

Ubiscrewed DRM allows a user to install on a single pc. At the time of installation, the users PC specifications, including several unique values such as hardware serial numbers, are used to generate a key which is transmitted to Ubisofts servers. That key is then used to access content essential to the games play, and to maintain a connection to the servers. Without that connection, and if your key doesnt match your hardware spec and other computer details, no game for you. That copy of the game is forever locked to that particular system, and should you change hardware at any point, or get a new pc, you’ll find yourselves buying another copy of the game too.

It doesn’t stop there though, it gets worse. At random points the Ubisoft servers will download an executable file that runs independantly of the game, checking your hardware. If it doesnt match your key, your game will deactivate instantly. Should the checking file not run for any reason, your game will deactivate. Should the game run for more than 2 hours without connecting to Ubisoft servers, it will deactivate permanently. Should any attempts be made to bypass the protection, it will begin to trash system operating files on the users Windows installation.

There’s much more, but obviously Ubisoft wished to protect their protection so to speak, so they wouldn’t go into detail. Though, a Ubisoft spokesman did tell us, “We want legitimate users to enjoy our products, if you’re not a pirate then you’ve nothing to fear. A few small restrictions are needed for the good of all, we tried to be nice with our last DRM, but those wankers beat us. Try this for size you thieving scum!”

He refused to comment upon speculation that future DRM protection systems might include retinal scans, DNA analysis, and a small improvised explosive device that fits into a usb port and detonates if piracy is detected.